Product Name: Keef Cola (regular strength)
Type: Medicated soda, infused with hash
Dosage: 1 bottle (12 oz.)
Price: Varies by retailer from approximately $5-$9
Packaging/Visual Appeal: (8.5/10) Keef Cola has a very professional presentation, with brightly-colored and clearly-printed labels that look as good any any smaller soda brand in the supermarket. The labels have full nutrition information, THC information (says 10mg THC, but two samples tested at ~37.5mg active THC), and a notice of “100% Vitamin C”. There is not a full ingredient list, the bottles simply say, “Sweetened with pure cane sugar. Contains natural and artificial flavors.” It would be nice if it had a full ingredients label as well as information on which strain/s were used in the production. The bottle is an opener-only type and cannot be twisted off by hand, which may be a problem for some people.
The sodas were slightly cloudy-looking due to the hash sediment that settles at the bottom of the bottle. While it would be nice to have a clear normal-looking soda, it is somewhat reassuring as a patient to see the medicine swirling around in the drink. A notice on the bottle to flip it over/lightly shake it before drinking to distribute the sediment would be a good addition, as that’s not made clear but seems to be a required part of the experience. The bottling itself seemed well done and it hissed when opened, indicating a healthy amount of carbonation.
Aroma: (7/10) We tried a few of the flavors on offer, but the main reviews involved the Lemonade and Root Beer. The Lemonade reminded our staff of an “Arnold Palmer” in both taste and smell, as the hash seemed to add an earthy, tea-like quality to the tangy and not particularly sweet lemon smell. The Root Beer reminded us more of a cream soda smell-wise, as it was extremely sweet and syrupy with more of a smooth vanilla as opposed to sarsaparilla aroma. The medicine could be detected in the aroma of both samples, though it was just a light hint that indicated that the drink wasn’t your standard soda.
Taste: (?/10) As our staff has different preferences in beverages, this category is difficult to assign a score to — one reviewer hated the Root Beer, but the other reviewer loved the Lemonade. The Root Beer was thought to be much too sweet and syrupy, with an odd medicinal aftertaste (stronger and more noticeable than in the Lemonade) that hampered the flavor further — the carbonation was also a little too much in our reviewer’s opinion. The Lemonade was in the vein of San Pellegrino “Limonata” rather than an American-style soda lemonade, carrying a healthy hit of bitter citrus and not a lot of sugar. Like the smell, the flavor had a tea-like quality from the hash which our reviewer enjoyed quite a bit — the medicine was detectable, but in a fairly tasty way that complimented the mid-level sweetness of the drink.
Effects: This is the standard strength Keef Cola (as opposed to the XXX, which is the high potency version), and it seems to simply not be strong enough for our review staff. Body type and size didn’t seem to matter a whole lot, as a ~200 lb. male reviewer and a small female reviewer both reported only mild effects, some of which might have been chalked up to the sugar buzz resulting from drinking a soda on an empty stomach. There was mild body relaxation that set in within 30 minutes of ingestion and kept up through approximately 2.5 hours (averaged out between reviewers), never leaving us feeling overtly medicated. A light pulsing feeling in the body and a bit of mental laziness were the most direct effects of the drink, and they began to wear off after about an hour.
Medical Uses: General relaxation, muscle tension relief, some appetite stimulation properties
Overall: This product is best suited for patients with low to medium tolerances, as it simply wasn’t strong enough for our veteran staff to provide any real medical relief. For one reviewer, the stomach discomfort caused by drinking a soda first thing in the morning on an empty stomach (to give it a very fair shot) outweighed the medical value the soda offered. The packaging and the product itself is very professional, though there was some disagreement on the quality of any given flavor. There could be some improvements to the ingredient information and especially the strain information… a notice about flipping the bottle to distribute the sediment evenly is also something that should be added for the future. In all, this was a mentally functional and slightly relaxing beverage that would work as a daytime relaxant, providing light relief for several hours. Patients with higher tolerance are probably best-served picking up the Keef Cola XXX though, as the medicinal value of this one was limited for our staff.
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